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X-Files: I want to believe

July 26th, 2008

I want to believe in a good X-Files movie.

Say it with me!

I want to believe in a good X-Files movie.

Unfortunately the truth most certainly is out there and it says that this movie stinks.

Look I wanted an awesome X-Files film, I so badly did and I couldn’t imagine that one could be a bad, even at its worst I imagined maybe a long episode just to check in on Scully and Mulder and see how they’re doing.

Tracey and I like getting our movie watching out of the way first thing up in the morning, generally you avoid the crowds and the kids by doing so. It was a bad sign when we slept in and missed the first showing. But we persevered and thought to ourselves ‘how bad could it be?‘ I mean the Dark Knight is still showing and surely that will get most of the crowds (which it did I might add, sold out again!).

So we show up and take our seats, there’s a fair few people in the cinema, I count three babies (I hate babies at M rated films, it is guaranteed that they will cry), about 90% teenagers and a couple of other couples. Weird mix considering half of the audience probably wasn’t old enough to watch even the first X-Files film.

I have never been able to tolerate particularly restless audiences, they annoy me and disrupt the film. But I completely forgive them this one time because the film made me restless and never before have I been that close to leaving halfway through. Four phones rang and were answered and no one complained or sighed or shooshed, frankly if my phone rang I would have answered it*!

Bad dialogue, stupid plot holes and bad characterisation.

This isn’t the X-Files. When people say that the movie is just like a long episode they are so wrong, no episode was this weak (and they had some poor episodes). The characters are all wrong (except maybe Mulder but I thank Ducovney for that), things aren’t explained and loose ends from the series are not answered. The ending is weak.