Star Trek TNG’s first DC comic
January 14th, 2008
There is a certain look and feel one encounters when watching the first couple of seasons of Star Trek: The Next Generation (TNG), the uniforms are kind of icky, and Deanna Troi wears her hair weirdly and of course Riker doesn’t have the beard but then he starts to grow it in the second season, Wesley is there (nothing against Wesley I actually don’t mind him), Worf’s head is huge and shiny.
The list goes on.
Unfortunately or fortunately depending on your point of view, the comic books seem to have captured the same icky feelings when it comes to their look and feel and their dialogue.
You see, the first comic Return to Raimon is wordy.
I’m talking whole pages dedicated to Picard talking about stuff, talking to people about stuff and occasionally people talking to him about stuff.
There is a lot of talking.
Very few comic book artists draw elaborate space scenes well and the first page is no exception, I mean it’s not three bag awful (see Reno 911) but I’m never comfortable with the scenes, space is pretty big and there’s a lot of it between things but these splash pages usually try and cram it all in on one page.
Then Picard talks for three pages (Riker does get to talk for a little while though, why does his beard look like mine when I was 17? Actually later on it fills in and looks like it is stuck on?? Did they not know he had a beard? Let’s just say Riker’s face is a mystery in this issue.) .
Cut to a rather ripped looking Worf beating up on some pleasant looking fellow in the holodeck, I mean what did this hologram do to Worf? He looks jolly? Is this what Klingons do? Beam down to jolly planets and open cans of whupass?
In the background some red head guy (not shirt, hair) chats to Geordi, Geordi talks about grass, oh yeah Geordi knows about grass.
Um then Dr Pulaski apparently doesn’t have to follow orders and can choose not to go on missions, and for some reason she hangs out in the transporter room just to talk to anyone beaming some place and to tell them that she isn’t going.
Oh man, Picard then talks for two pages before beaming down to the planet of the week. We are then treated to watching the red head who was talking to the pot head Geordi get his arse handed to him by the jolly fellow in the holodeck that Worf roughed up earlier. Mmmm I sense a character questioning his self worth and saving the day later on. Nah that would be lame!
The away team beams into the middle of a party celebrating the funeral of the current leader who hasn’t died yet, but that’s their custom, aren’t they weird and alien!?!?
Picard talks for a bit to some dude who doesn’t like him and feels he shouldn’t have come despite being invited.
Perhaps he thinks Picard talks too much?
Hang on, a girl has rushed over and hugged Picard! Could this be the little girl Picard was talking about earlier (he talked about her earlier in one of his talk fests - don’t make me go back and read them again)?
Yes she is that little girl!
Riker can’t help himself because she’s a woman and an alien and hitting on female aliens is what Riker does, he is McLovin (see Superbad). The thing is though, Picard cock blocks him (see Superbad again - it’s not that good but McLovin is funny as!). Some wingman Picard is.
Then we’re back on the ship where the B cast is sitting around talking (good grief) and then Wesley joins them and they talk about how Picard has problems with kids and there is probably a scene that was cut out with O’Brian saying something like Picard’s a cock blocker and he hates going down to planets with him and he wishes to one day work on a space station, preferably one with a view of some space anomaly.
We cut to the bridge where apparently Data is in charge and has given everyone except Worf the day off. Worf is understandably pissed at Data and uses the term ’sir’ like he questions Data’s right to be in command which is probably not a bad idea considering that Data let everyone else abandon the bridge. There is for example no one driving.
Oh yeah, Deanna Troi is there also being… well useless I suppose.
On the planet intrigue ensues as Picard is sent to visit the King of the planet in the middle of the night and has to climb a rope and ride a horse (talking for most of it as well, I mean really dude this is supposed to be in secret).
Surprise, surprise he is framed for the murder of the king. I wonder if he’ll be exonorated in issue 2 or will Riker have to kill every sonafabitch on the planet flexing his Starfleet might?
Stay tuned!
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Categories: Comics | Tags: comic books, DC, Review, Star Trek, the next generation, TNG
i thought for sure that said the return of “Ramon” like a mexican soccer player or something similar
sir jorge’s last blog post..Vampirella #10
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No, that big cosmic oven chip is definitely an “I”…
or maybe it is just a big cosmic oven chip, fleeing a hungry Mexican soccer star across the cosmic wotsit
John’s last blog post..Curly cloud horizons
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SJ - Ironic that they would start their brand new series with a sequel of sorts about a character we’ve never heard of and may or may not play for Liverpool.
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John - if Douglas Adams had written this (apart from it being good) I’m pretty certain he would have had those letters hanging in space.
“it is with no short order of coincidence that the Enterprise at that very moment passed a rock formation that for an instant spelt out the words Return to Raimon. Of course the only person actually looking out of a window at that precise moment was a young ensign named Arthur and frankly no one ever believed anything he said anyway.”
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That sounded corny. But well I guess we’ve got to be happy that they somehow learned something from the start.
Arjan’s last blog post..Meme
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Well I certainly hope they do learn, I never really read TNG comics so I don’t what they are like further down the track.
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Lee, I can’t find a subscribe button on your site!!!???
BTW - Deanna Troi brings a LOT to a scene!!! She’s beautiful!!!! My favourite character in fact!
See, it takes all types to attract all types of viewer! 
Lightening’s last blog post..Entrecard Update
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Hi Lee!
Actually, that issue wasn’t DC Comics’ first TNG effort. They did a six-issue mini-series first, set squarely in Season One, but it did feature the same artists, who seemed to give all the characters a long-legged, superhero-type stance. But yes, it was pretty wordy, too.
It was controversial for its addition of a squabbling husband and wife, the Bickleys, who worked Con and Ops and, just as Worf had his sash, they wore half-capes (more superheroes?) to signify their Earth colony planet origins. They were meant as a homage to an old radio serial, “The Bickersons”, and were meant to provide the comic/angry banter that the regular TNG characters were not allowed to do, and which Spock and McCoy provided in TOS.
That first mini-series was later collected as a graphic novel-format trade paperback, “TNG: The Beginning”.
The one you reviewed was #1 of the first ongoing monthly TNG comic, and it started with Season Two stories, but Pulaski disappears soon (as do the young, freckled engineer and his wife, who are probably redraws/rethinks of the Bickleys from the mini-series).
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Hi there Lightning - you bring up a very good point about my feed icon - to be honest I never really gave it too much thought as Firefox automatically finds the feed anyway whenever I visit a site. I’ll add the button asap!
Don’t get me wrong I don’t dislike Troi (not entirely as you’ll see from my next post if I get it there tonight) but I hate the way the writers waste her completely! Which I think they did with a few of the characters especially the female crew members.
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Hi Therin - I kinda knew when I posted it that this was the case as I think I actually have the original mini series in storage amongst the rest of my comics. If I remember correctly it was inaccurate with some of the details which in hindsight I picked up.
I feel bad for them when they were doing the Star Trek series in between ST2 3 and 4 which at one stage had Kirk as Captain of the Excelsior. The movies kept changing everything on them.
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Thanks for the tip re firefox and feeds. I’ve only just started using firefox as a browser so still finding my way around. I was wondering why I had a feed icon show up in the little address bar thingy (don’t laugh at my lack of technical lingo!!!
).
Phew, I’m glad you don’t dislike Troi cos *if* I was to ever choose a character I wanted to be and *if* I ever went to one of those thingies where you dress up as one, that would be my choice. A slightly plumper, less beautiful version though. ROFLOL.
Lightening’s last blog post..PARTY! PARTY! PARTY!
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I do hope Lightening that you would choose the later seasons Troi when she is wearing the actual uniform rather than the weird purple outfit!
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