Apr 11 2008
Top five signs that your plane trip is going to suck
- The in-flight meal smells a little funky - Oh dear the pilot, the co-pilot, the navigator and the cabin crew all ate the fish and are now lined up at the bathroom looking pretty green. You better hope that there is a burnt out ex military pilot who will overcome his demons to get you onto the ground in one piece. Surely it’s not that serious? It most certainly is and don’t call me Shirley.
- You’re the President of the United States of America - Awesome I’m the leader of America and I’ve got a cool jet. Yeah cool jet if you don’t mind aliens blowing up the White House, terrorists taking over Air Force One or terrorists shooting it down using a stolen stealth fighter (at least you’d get to meet Jack Bauer).
- There is a gremlin on the wing - Can’t… you… see the thing on the wing? Isn’t it always the way? Unhelpful cabin crew who just because they can’t see the mythical creature endangering the plane go and treat you like a psychopath.
- You’ve just been paroled - You’ve just been paroled but instead of being released directly from the facility you are currently incarcerated they decide to fly you some place else to let you go. Probably not a good sign if you have a diabetic friend who for some reason is also coming along for the ride.
- There are snakes on the motherfucking plane!!! - This is pretty obvious.
I’m going to be doing this ‘Top Fives’ on every Friday from here on (last week it was Kurt Russell) so if you have a topic you’d like to see my top five on send it on over!!
Next week Top Five Bill Murray films…
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tss fryday..I’ve got almost 8 hours of thursday left overhere
Where are the burning engines? The incoming geese (that really súcks)? Sometimes a top 5 is a bit short ^^
Arjan’s last blog post..Yahtzee gaming reviewer
Yeah, what’s with this Friday stuff… stop cutting my week short. How about moving into a time zone closer to me? After all, I’m taking the time to read your blog. Seems only fair.
I like the Top 5 list idea. Hope you can keep it going. Good luck. We’re all counting on you. Win this one for the Zipper.
As for this list… don’t forget that the ex-military pilot will be easy to identify by his wet shirt from his drinking problem and excessive sweating.
Jeff’s last blog post..It’s Not Fair!
Top five friday sounds good to me.
I shall have to think of some topic suggestions
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Another sign you’re in trouble is if you fly any of the following airlines: Trans-Global, TransPacific or Oceanic.
Check carefully…
And as for the ‘Top Five Friday’ - cool idea (or, what Jeff said)…
Go for it!
Captain Incredible’s last blog post..A Question, If I May…
Top five Fridays? Cool!
How about “Top five coolest one-liners from action films”?
Arjan can I help it if you are slow
Me, I’ll take burning engines over the snakes - I stand by my very scientific research!
Jeff - “drinking problem and excessive sweating” my god we need to get this man to a hospital…
What is it doctor?
It’s a big white building with lots of sick people inside it but that’s not important now.
Sure Dan, I expect very little from you now you are blogging from the pub.
Cap - Ok I got two of those but can’t work TransPacific out?
Ian - I think at least a variation on that could be arranged.
There’s a sale at Penney’s!!
Jeff’s last blog post..It’s Not Fair!
Hey Lee,
Has anyone ever told you you watch too much TV???? LOL.
Lightening’s last blog post..Are You A Tightwad????
Being married to Bruce Willis and anywhere near an airport is also a bad idea.
Hmmm I’m thinking a ‘where did Brittney leave her underwear’ top 5, but that may just be too easy.
Marita’s last blog post..Schools
I’ve just been re-reading my recent post and I realise I never mentioned it - TransPacific was the airline flown by both Jaime Sommers and Steve Austin in separate episodes of their bionic shows, in which the plane (flown by the same guy each time) crashed on a remote island…
It’s possible TransPacific showed up on other TV shows as well, but that would mean research…
Captain Incredible’s last blog post..A Question, If I May…
try flying one of those old badly maintained Russian Antonov’s that’ll get you crashed!
Arjan’s last blog post..Braaaaaaaaaaaains!
Lightening - it’s either that or going out and doing stuff!
Marita - Being married to Bruce is bad for airplane trips, actually being Bruce and indestructible is bad too.. um hang on that was a train I think.
Maybe a where didn’t she leave them would be easier
Nice bit of trivia there Cap
Arjan - is the Antonov reference a pop culture one or are you just pointing out that they do crash if badly maintained? I found reference to them in Lord of War???
nothing to do with pop culture, it’s just that Antonov’s have a bad rep of crashing. But the crashing is mostly due to bad maintenance in eastern European countries.
Arjan’s last blog post..Braaaaaaaaaaaains!
I didn’t think so Arjan but I’m sure we could find ourselves a whole bunch of pop references anyway
BTW that Brains post = gross.
yeah sorry for the big picture of my face
Arjan’s last blog post..Braaaaaaaaaaaains!